I don’t know what the heck is wrong with me, but I just can’t seem to get my butt into gear and do a simple 5-10 minute work out. As good as walking is for you, I’d like to do more. My body is telling me that I need to do more. My posture is so bad that it’s causing me pain in multiple areas. I’m weak. But most importantly (as I just mentioned) my body telling me and I need to listen.

I don’t know what it is about this year, but I feel a stronger desire to improve some aspects of my life, like being a better mom in my own eyes (cause I really don’t care to bicker with other moms about what’s right and wrong), becoming a little more healthy, nurturing my relationships with Nate and my parents, and using social media less (because, let’s face it, the social media addiction is ridiculous and I remember that I used to live just fine without it, and there can be so much negativity that circulates thanks to it).

Believe it or not the social media thing is a big one. I’ve whined about it plenty in the past. Sure, it’s great to connect and you can hear about some really cool stuff, but I absolutely hate the fact that it’s a time waster and a filler when I think there’s nothing else better to do. It’s become my default and I loathe it. It’s become one of the sole purposes of picking up my phone and I hate that! It does nothing but distract me, and when I’m picking up my phone to check something else entirely and I automatically open my Facebook app without thinking, that’s a red flag to me. So what I want to do is only check Facebook once a week. I’ll keep messenger on my phone, but it’s not like people message me anyway.

I have no idea if I can do this right off the bat. It might take me several weeks to get over it. I already feel this nagging desire to check my Facebook as I’ve been successful in NOT looking at it all day. But can I keep it going? I sure as hell hope so!

Anyway, I’ve made an important and yet obvious discovery. I started going to bed earlier and a couple of those mornings I’ve woken up in much better moods. I’ve had more patience with Hannah and in return she’s been more responsive to me. So I think the trick me my having better days is getting a good night’s sleep at an earlier time than my usual midnight bedtime. But then, sometimes happened because a few days later I started tossing and turning. The next day I only feel “okay”, and at night I feel frustrated that I can just get comfortable and stay asleep. I’m pretty tired today. Those restless nights have caught up with me. But I’m also going to start drinking my sleepy time milk again because before it would actually help me sleep through the night. On those evenings when I’d skip it I would definitely notice, waking up at least once and not going back to sleep so readily. I miss the days when I sleep was never an issue. That I knew I’d sleep through the night no matter what. Those were the days!


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